Some weeks before, I was very nervous about the test to join with this GLPS wintercamp. I prayed all night to pass the test. When several days after, mom and dad told me that Ipass the test. I thought they were lying because I never thought that I could pass the test. When they show me the hamepage, I as shocked. More that one-thousands thoughts sere passing through my brain. I was so suprised and also I was very happy at the same time.
December 25th, in christmas, we took a bus to go to Minjok Leadership highschool. When I arrived to here, I was so proud and little nerves. I came to here and I saw the school. It was very beautiful. The traditional korean-style house was there for the school. It was very unique to me. When I went to my dorm, and meet my roommate, all of them were very kind and fun. We became very close to each other during just few hours.
I thought I have to study had and become more closer to each other like family. I thought I have to study hard and become more closer with each other. I thought this can be a uniquye and good experience in my life.
Good job! I could feel your excitement from your descriptive essay. I really liked the introduction which describes the flow of your sentiments well. If you could have explained more about the uniqueness and beauty of the campus, it would add more color to your essay. Also check some of grammatical errors including diction, repetitive, and spacing.
ReplyDelete